Down on the Corner

2008-05-03T04:07:00.000-07:00

Down on the Corner

Disclaimer: It was nearly 4 in the morning when I finished this and the week after finals, and right before I leave for the Middle East, so I am quite tired. Forgive me for any mistakes.

Ok. For all of you who don’t know this already, I spent my spring break, the week of March 15-23 living on the streets in a homeless community. At this point people are probably either thinking, “oh wow that’s amazing,” or on the other side of the spectrum, “oh wow, you’re an idiot.” Believe me I got both reactions when people found out what was going on.

One of the other first reactions I got from people when I told them what I was doing was why? Why would a college student want to spend their spring break hanging out with homeless people and living that lifestyle for a spell? Well, Jesus put himself in my shoes to serve me and all mankind, so why should I be immune from living the life of another in order to know how to serve them as well? It’s a pretty simple concept I think. How can I serve them if I don’t know what it is that they go through on a day to day basis? So that was the goal of the week. To live the life of a homeless man in order to

know how best I can serve them.

Also during this time I was doing something thru the school where I had to give up one thing everyday for thirty days. Most of the things I had to give up during this time had no affect on me but a few of them affected me greatly. So if I mention having to give something up that is what that’s all about.

First of all let me tell you who everyone is.

Frank-Hillary’s husband and also the king of the camp.
Hillary-Franks wife and queen of the camp.
Tom-Funny fun loving guy who used to be a carpenter. He is one of the more troublesome of the bunch.
Jimmy-He is the talker and Tom’s counterpart. They get into some trouble together.
Jerry-He is basically the uncle and is a very quite but amazingly fun and funny guy.
Donna-Also known as “Vodka” Donna. Extreme alcoholic with some pretty evident psychological issues
Kathy-Mother of the three kids.
Marty-Kathy’s boyfriend
Anita-Kathy’s amazing five year old daughter.
Gabrielle and Isaac-Kathy’s four year old twins who don’t talk.

Day one

Saturday March 15

I set out today in the early afternoon. After indulging myself with my final sure meal of “Easy Mac” and a nice hot shower I went to watch a little softball where Cal Baptist whooped on Hope International, just for you Angie, and said goodbye to a few friends. Then it was time to head out.

I left the school with confidence, excitement and also a deal of fear. I had some ridiculously freaky dreams about the whole experience the few nights before I actually left but I tried not to let those get to me, but believe me they didn’t leave my mind. I was pretty confident and excited though. Mostly because those people who I had chosen to tell what I was doing had really gotten behind me. More than once in the days preceding my leaving I had the privilege of seeing groups of people get together for the simple purpose of praying for me. I have never experienced that and it was that and their prayers also through the week that really got me through when I wanted to turn back.

So I was off for about a 10 mile walk. I left the school with only a backpack with an extra pair of socks, a sleeping bag, a book, my Bible and a bottle for water. Not the greatest survival supplies but it was sufficient.

The walk was long. It took me over 2 hours to get the where I was going, the “Sav a minit” market. But the walk was a good thing for me. It allowed me time to check myself and make sure I was in this for the right reasons before actually being in the middle of everything.

Finally after a long hot walk, I met up with Frank. Frank is basically the equivalent to the “king of the camp.” Nobody comes into the camp without the approval of Frank and if you do something wrong in his eyes while he is around he will let you know. After meeting up with him we walked to the camp together to meet up with the others.

Once we got to the camp I got to see my new home. It was a little empty tent with poles that don’t fit it so it like to sway and maybe every once in a while collapse. The whole camp was in a field across the street from an elementary school and just off of the freeway. The only entrance was through a little hole in the fence, but every time before you entered you had to check to make sure no cops were around.

Once I got settled into the camp I went to meet up with Jimmy and Tom on the corner of the freeway. They were just sitting around having a good time and nobody was flying the sign so I figured I’d go for it. (Considering the fact that I had zero money and had no idea whether or not I would get to eat the next day). So I flew the sign. It was a hard thing to do. You would be amazed at how well and seemingly people can ignore you. That or they will look at you disgusted. It is not something most people will ever feel and I wish it was something nobody had to experience. The homeless community is truly the modern day lepers of our society. Regardless though I did make a little bit of money on my first try. A whole $2.28. Not a real good score but I figured it would be enough to get a little food in my stomach tomorrow.

The night that followed this first day was long, hard and cold. It seemed the nights in this lifestyle were twice as long as the days. It also rained that night. I was lucky to even have a tent. I know that there were others who were sleeping actually on the streets with not much more than some blankets and maybe some carpeting they found to add a little softness to the hard concrete. Also my sleeping bag that I had broke in one corner so I had to keep my feet in the proper corner all night to keep it from unzipping. Plus it was slightly too short for me so that didn’t help much either. Needless to say it wasn’t a real restful night. About the only comfort I felt that night came from a little bag of Craisons that my friend Amanda had so wisely made me take with me.

Day Two

Sunday March 16

I had decided to go to church on Sunday just to get a feeling of how “church people” would react to having a homeless person in their church. I was actually pleasantly surprised. People in the church assumed I was homeless for the most part I think. One guy actually asked me if I was just passing through, so I decided to go with that story for the rest of the congregation as well.

I went to a Sunday school for college age students and wouldn’t you know it there was somebody there who goes to my school. I didn’t actually know her but I recognized her and hoped she wouldn’t recognize me.

During Sunday school I think I made the guy teaching pretty uncomfortable. He was real nice and treated me well but he couldn’t remember the things he was teaching and was fumbling over his words a lot. I guess I can’t blame him but the church treated me real well and with a lot of respect so I have happy with what happened.

After church I was going to try and head to Fairmount Park to get some food from a church group who feeds down there every Sunday. Unfortunately for me I had no idea where the park was and once I finally found it I was too late for the food. So I figured I would be going hungry for the day.

After the park I decided to try flying a sign a bit hoping to get just enough for a bite of food. I was already at this point somewhat tired of being ignored by the people who drove by so I decided to make a sign that read “I am not invisible”. For some reason this sign didn’t make me much money. I think I got a dollar out of it but no more. I guess people don’t like homeless people trying to make a statement. Oh well.

On my way back to camp I found out that there was a church downtown that gives a hot meal on Sunday nights so I decided to go catch that. But I couldn’t make it there without encountering some interesting folks. While I was walking I had a lady and her husband, pretty normal looking people, ask we if I would like to have a prayer with them. I was initially excited and I had thought they wanted me to pray for them but turns out I was wrong and shouldn’t have been excited at all. The lady started praying and the things that came out of her mouth shocked me. She was asking God to keep all the niggers away and at the end asked that we could all have a “good white day”. Shamefully I was speechless. I couldn’t even confront them about it. I don’t know who they think they were praying to but it was not God. Not the creator and master of this world. After that I just sat straight down on the corner and just prayed. I didn’t know what more to do.

After about 2 hours of wandering around the city trying to find the church I was finally there just in time to get the food. Tom and Jimmy were there so I was sitting with them. It was an interesting meal they decided to serve. They gave us salad, rolls, and some sort of pasta that tasted like some sort of cross between spaghetti o’s and death. It was weird. They also gave some kind of cake as well that was real good. Far to rich though for me to even think about eating it all.

It was interesting to be on the other side of feedings. Sadly though this feeding didn’t seem all that well done. There was no interaction between the people serving and those eating. I understand that they feed a lot of people and that is great but I would just like to see them show some love in other ways as well.

I also met a friend of Tom and Jimmy’s during this time. Her name is Crazy Donna, or Vodka Donna. She was a character. She was slightly normal when sober but isn’t ever so she is quite crazy.

While at dinner Donna decided to get angry at some guy and hit him. Needless to say the guy was angry and while Donna was walking out the door he decided to kick her in the back and then throw her over a table. It was quite a sight. Now Tom seeing all this ran over to whoop the guy but luckily before Tom got there somebody else had gotten the guy by the neck and somebody else grabbed Tom to keep him from doing anything.

I had now seen my first, what they all call, wreck. Basically a wreck is anytime you get into any sort of trouble and out there you can get into a wreck real quick.

This second night was equally as long but thankfully wasn’t quite as cold. But on the other hand the wind was blowing hard all night long and was basically collapsing my tent right on top of me. It didn’t allow for much sleep. I just couldn’t wait for the sun to come up to give some relief to the long night.

Day Three

Monday March 17

I set out after the long night before in hopes of having a bit more luck making money today. I didn’t know if there were any feedings going on today so I just planned on finding my own food.

I decided to try a different sign today. I decided to go with one that said “hard times please help”. People seemed far more sympathetic to this one than they did the other.

After being on the corner for just a little while a guy pulled up in a huge red Ford. I thought to myself “oh here’s another well off person who is gonna ignore me.” Boy was I wrong. The guy rolled down the window and I could hear his ridiculously loud hard rock blaring, and he stuck his arm out and handed me twenty bucks. I didn’t even know how to thank him enough. I now had enough money to get me plenty of food and I would also be able to do and get some things for the kids. It was great.

At that point I packed up and started to head back towards camp. I stopped off at the store on the way back and got some candy and such things for the kids.

Back at camp I gave the candy to the kids. It’s amazing to see somebody get so excited about something that is seemingly so simple. That’s the way they live though. Little things make their day.

I got to sit down with Anita back at camp and read her the creation story. It was amazing! She is such a smart little girl. I just had her sitting on my lap and she just listened. All the way through I asked her questions and she answered them with a smile all the way through. I even got her to say who made everything. I would ask her “Anita, how did the mountains get here?” And she would answered loud and proud, “God made them.” It was one of the most rewarding things I have ever seen. It made my day.

Today was not only St. Patty’s day but it was also Hillary’s birthday. I’m not sure how old she was turning but it turned into a celebration. Frank and Hillary had got a hold of a little extra money that day so Frank was able to buy a cake and he made enchiladas for everyone. It was some dang good food, especially for being made in a makeshift kitchen outside. I was thoroughly impressed.

For hours we all just sat around camp and talked. Not about anything profound but just sitting and hanging out and enjoying the company. It was a really good time. Also Frank had music going the whole time. Luckily they all have pretty good taste in music. Except for Marty. He likes rap and that is horrible.

Towards the end of the night everyone decided to have a toast for Hillary. I decided I couldn’t pass that up so I had a little wine. Green apple flavored. Not so good, but it was for a good cause. So anyone who wants to judge me, you can come to California, if you’re not already here, and stone me. Though I would not enjoy that.

That night ended up being the coldest by far of the whole week, which made for an extremely long night.

Day Four

Tuesday March 18

When I woke up in the morning the grass was frozen. It was not too nice. It made it really hard to actually accept the fact that I should crawl out of my tent and try to accomplish something with my day.

So I decided to go to a little Bible study time at the city mission with Jimmy. At first I wasn’t too sure what to think of the whole thing. They talked about the resurrection story which was good but the lady who was leading it seemed to treat the people kind of childishly, which kind of bothered me, but all the people I talked to seemed to really like it and the Gospel was being presented to people so I decided it was a good thing. Plus they fed us pancakes, so I was a fan.

I found myself later in the day in kind of a strange spot. I accidentally spit on a bee while I was waiting for lunch, and couldn’t help but try to pull the bee out and try to help it. Which brings me to something I’ll talk about more at the end of this whole thing.

In the afternoon I decided it was time to head back towards camp. I didn’t make it too far before getting distracted. I saw Tom, Jimmy, Donna and her daughter whose name I don’t even know, sitting at the bus stop. They had all been drinking quite a bit today, especially the daughter who also happens to have a huge problem with cutting herself. She could hardly even walk and to make things even worse she decided to start walking home and Jimmy and Donna did nothing to try to stop it. That irritated me a bit. Needless to say she didn’t get too far. She collapsed in a field about 50 yards off from the bus stop and nobody would go help her. So I went hoping to at least be able to get her home. That didn’t work out to well considering she was so drunk she couldn’t even tell me where home was. So I ended up carrying her back to the bus stop and leaving her in the care of Jimmy and Donna who swore to me they would get her on a bus and home. I was hesitant to leave but I was real tired and wanted to get back to camp.

Before I left though a strange thing happened. A guy actually came up to us and asked for a dollar. Not a homeless guy either. At first I just thought he was being a jerk but it turned out he and his wife had been walking around all day and he wasn’t getting paid till the end of the week and his wife was thirsty. I figured that was legit so I gave it to him. It just kinda caught me off guard. It was basically the exact opposite of what I would have expected.

Things at camp that night were no better than the bus stop. Everybody was in really bad moods. Especially Frank. The way he treats Hillary takes the man being the head to a whole new level that I have never experienced. He expects her to do every little thing he says and if she doesn’t he just gets pissed off and yells at her like she is worthless. It’s terrible.

They did try to teach me how to play dominos though. That was a hoot. I had no idea what was going on and they are the most competitive people I have ever seen, but somehow Tom and I got lucky and we ended up winning the first game.

I was able to have a good talk with Frank after everyone else went to bed. He apologized to me for some things and he wanted to read something from the Bible with me. Which was funny because he pulled a Bible out of his tent that I had given to Jimmy a long time ago which Jimmy lost before we even left the park. Frank didn’t even know where he got it. He told me some story about some people who gave it to him at the park when I had actually given it to Jimmy. Apparently he decided he needed it more so he took it. I had a good laugh about it.

So we read through Hebrews 1 which is basically about how great Jesus is. It was really good but I don’t think Frank got much out of it. Sadly he was so drunk that while we were sitting there and he was talking to me he peed all over himself and didn’t even know it.

Day Five

Wednesday March 19

I woke up this morning feeling pretty refreshed. I had actually slept pretty well and woke up with the warm sun on my face. It seemed like it could be a pretty good day.

When I was on my way to the park this morning I saw Donna and her daughter at the bus stop. It was the first time I had ever seen Donna sober and not yelling at somebody. They told me that another lady named Donna, who I had met about two days earlier, had died yesterday. Apparently she was riding her bike across the street and got hit by a 19 year old kid. She died there on the spot. That news kind of ruined the refreshing feeling of the morning.

But at lunch time Erin, Lauren, Amanda, Ethan and Kyle all came to visit. They are all friends of mine from school. They came to the park and met up with everyone and brought some pizzas. It was great to see them. Unfortunately I got so caught up with talking to them that by the time to thought of eating all the pizza was gone. But just being able to see them and be encouraged by them was far greater than any food could ever be. Seeing them was just what I needed at that point in the week.

Later that night I got to talk to Hillary about the kids. It didn’t go so well. I basically told her that I didn’t know if I could sit back and watch these kids grow up that way. She basically told me, with some choice words, that I couldn’t do anything about it. She couldn’t see the kids taken away from their mother. It was really hard to hear her say those things.

Day Six

Thursday March 20

I woke up late this morning. Slept in till 9. Actually slept pretty well too.

I was hoping this morning to make a few bucks before going to lunch at “Set Free” but when I got to my corner of choice there was a lady there, and in this world when somebody is already in a spot you don’t mess with it. They would call that “busting their play” and that is a good way to get yourself into some trouble.

A little later in the day I found my spot free but nobody was feeling giving today. I left that spot having made absolutely nothing. It’s not a good feeling walking away that way but it comes with the territory. Sometimes you have good days and sometimes you don’t. It’s just the way it works.

Later though I met up with Tom and Jimmy at a different spot and they weren’t flying, so I decided to try my luck hoping to get a little more love than before. Instead I got the exact opposite. A lot of yelling happened that day. For some reason people seemed to be much angrier than any other time I had been out there. I got a lot of “get a job you bum” and a lot of cussing. Doesn’t really make sense to me but whatever. Tom and Jimmy just brush it off as an “occupational hazard.”

I actually had a guy offer me a job though while I was out there. I didn’t think he was serious so I told him I wasn’t gonna be in town long. At that point he cussed me out and called me a “lazy ass” and then sped off. Oh well.

In the end I made about five bucks at that spot. Not too bad. I figured it would at least get me some food for the next day.

After that grand adventure we headed down to Fairmount Park for a feeding. The feeding there is done by a guy by the name of “Big” Jim Ward. I had been hearing about him all week long. Everybody on the streets seemed to have great respect for this guy so I was real excited to see what he was all about.

We made it to the park a little early so we were just sitting around a picnic table talking to some people and strangely enough I met a guy called “Arkansas” who had actually gone to Cal Baptist in the 80’s. He had come out here from Arkansas on a basketball scholarship and apparently got into a little trouble and left school and I guess he just never made it home. I wonder what the people at the school would think to know one of their own is now living on the streets.

Come to find out why everyone loves “Big” Jim so much. He is a great guy. Not only does he feed great food but he really cares about the people who get the food. It was the one feeding I went to all week where the people giving the food would actually sit down and talk with those eating and pray with them or just hug them. It was really encouraging to see that there are people like him around. Though they may be few, there are some and it felt good to know that.

Found out later that night that a cop had come up to the camp today. Apparently somebody had reported that they saw a camp up there so came to check it out. I guess he was real nice about it. He told them they didn’t have to leave but he did have to make a report of what he saw. Unfortunately he also said he wasn’t going to report that he had seen kids in the camp. It was disheartening to hear that. I had hoped he would do it so I wouldn’t have to. But it didn’t seem like that would happen.

Day Seven

Friday March 21

Nothing too exciting happened today until night. I did go to “Set Free” again for lunch though. After seeing “Big” Jim’s feeding it really broke my heart to see how much the workers there don’t want to be there. They seem to not care at all or really even believe in what they are doing. I just hope I never end up that way, losing sight of why I am out here.

Back at camp tonight was terrible. Frank was drunk again and in the worst mood I have ever seen. He was being terrible to Hillary basically yelling at her and calling her every name you can think of that would be degrading to a black woman. I couldn’t handle it anymore. I told Hillary I wasn’t going to be staying there tonight and she just kept saying “It’s ok. We’re alright, don’t worry.” I just couldn’t take it anymore so I packed up my stuff with no idea where to go.

I ended up seeing Tom and Jimmy sitting in a field having a drink with some other guy I hadn’t ever met. I stopped and talked with them a while and it turns out the guy they were with was one of Riversides finest gangsters fresh out of prison for attempted murder. We’ll just call him Dale because I don’t really feel like spreading his name around.

For some reason in the time we were there Dale took a liking to me and an interest in what I was doing out there. So he told me he was going to take me downtown for the night and show me how to live. Needless to say I was pretty terrified. Especially when he admitted to me that he was carrying a gun. But really I wasn’t afraid of him. He really did seem like a nice guy, but I was more afraid of what people we might meet who don’t like him so much.

So we went downtown and he took me to this Mexican restaurant where we got free food for some reason. I’m guessing it’s because the people there know him and are afraid of him. I didn’t complain though, I got free food and it was good.

After eating he wanted to take me to a bar to play some darts. Unfortunately we couldn’t get in because there was a cover charge and the boss was there that night so they wouldn’t let us in for free. We ended up meeting some people who were on the bar patio and stood around talking with them for a couple of hours but we ended up getting kicked out because they had been passing beer to Dale over the wall. So I got kicked out of my first bar without even stepping foot into it. No big deal though. We just headed to the next one. We actually got into this one but got kicked out the minute we set foot inside. Apparently the people there knew Dale and didn’t want him around.

At this point it was getting pretty late so I parted ways with Dale to find a place to sleep. After walking around for a couple of hours I finally settled into a spot underneath some stairs across the street from one of the county buildings. It was just a little patch of dirt but it was covered and I wouldn’t be seen so I decided it would be good. Unfortunately though, I had no jacket for the night so I basically froze.

Day Eight

Saturday March 22

I woke up today before the sun after probably two hours of sun. I figured it was good to get out of there before I was seen by the cops and got yelled at.

The majority of the day was pretty slow. I had gone back to camp in the afternoon to say goodbye to everyone but they never showed up so I decided to head down to the park until nighttime.

On my way to the park I saw Tom at the bus stop laying facedown on the sidewalk with blood all over his backpack and some lady standing over him. Apparently Tom had a little too much to drink and fell and cracked his ear on the sidewalk and the lady had stopped to help him out.

It actually seemed bad enough that somebody had called an ambulance but he was fine. They just told us to get him up off the ground and they left.

The lady who was there had given us some water and things and gave me ten bucks and told me to get them on a bus and then keep the rest of the money, which was great because now I had enough money to get some food in the morning before heading to church.

Just after all this stuff happened three other ladies pulled up to us and gave us bags of food. They also wanted to pray with us which was cool. Not really what I expected though. They prayed very passionately condemning the alcohol and the addictions. But over all it was a good experience.

Once Tom was good to go I continued down towards the park. While I was walking I heard somebody yelling my name. Turns out it was Jerry. It was really cool. He actually wanted my company. He has never done anything like that before, so I just sat with him a while and talked a bit. Then he left to go lay down for the night so we parted ways.

This day was my day to fast from sleep so I had decided I was going to go up to Mt. Rubidoux for the night and just hang out and then go to the sunrise service that they hold up there. So I went and I got to the top only to get kicked out by the cops. Apparently they were setting up for the morning so there was security all over the place and they wouldn’t let me stay. At that point my plans were shot and I had no idea what to do. So I headed back down towards the park.

When I got to the park there was a bluegrass band playing at the coffee shop right across the street. It was nice. There were big sliding doors on the side so I could just sit outside and enjoy the music. It was a nice way to end a long day but the people around didn’t seem to care for me being there too much. Oh well.

I ended up spending most of the night in the park. It was not a fun time. There were people all over the place coming from a club and one guy who kept walking through the park and looking at me. I was pretty sure I was going to have some problems with him but thankfully it ended up being nothing. He just really kind of creeped me out.

By about four in the morning I was really struggling. I was already exhausted from the week and the lack of sleep from the night before didn’t help at all. I kept seeing people walk by me who weren’t actually there (I wasn’t on drugs, I was just exhausted). So when that started happening I decided it was acceptable for me to get a little rest. I slept on the steps of an office building.

Day Nine

Sunday March 23

I was rudely awakened this morning from a train rolling by around six. I was still exhausted but was also freezing so I decided it was a good idea to get moving. I decided on Thursday to go to “Big” Jim’s church for Easter so I headed out towards the area.

Today was my day to go without shoes so I was off not really knowing where I was going shoeless and tired.

Jim had told me about where the church was but may have downplayed how fare it actually was from where I was staying. It ended up being about a ten mile walk half of which had no sidewalks so I was walking on gravel.

By the time I made it to the church it was around 9:30 and I basically just walked into the pastor’s office and collapsed in the chair. He just laughed at me and said, “Long walk huh?” I just laughed.

The church service was pretty good. They actually introduced me in front of the congregation and let me explain everything that I was doing. Shoeless and all I was treated greatly in that church.

During the greeting time, after I was introduced, I had a guy walk up to me with tears in his eyes and say, “I’m glad you’re ok. I was about to go out and by you some shoes.” I just told him I was glad to see there were still people in churches that care.

After the service Jim gave me a ride home. My feet were far too sore from the walk that morning to try to walk again and the only way I knew how to get home would have ended up being nearly twenty miles. No thanks.

The rest of the day after being home is kind of a blur at this point. I was basically in an exhaustion induced state of drunkenness. All I really remember is that I went to Amanda’s for dinner and then was hanging out with Amanda and Erin and passed out on Amanda’s couch and drooled all over her pillow. Oops.

What Did I learn?

Not all homeless people are drunks.
Not all homeless are out on the streets due to laziness or poor personal choices.
The best way to minister to the homeless is showing them you care not only with food but with your time. Many just want somebody to sit and talk to and somebody who isn’t going to judge them.
Gangsters can be nice people. But they can still be scary
It’s not hard to accept things from people when you are hungry.
If you’re homeless you are seemingly invisible to society
There are good people in the world. Some of them don’t even have homes.
The nights spent on the street are ridiculously and almost unbearably long.
It’s really hard to read and write when it’s dark. Who would of thought?
It’s not real fun to walk without shoes for extended periods of time on crappy surfaces, but people all over the world do it on a daily basis.

One of the things that got me most during this week God showed me how great he is in such simple ways. Through just seeing his creation in a new light sometimes just caused me to sit in aww of the greatness of my God. Simple things like a flower, or the bee I spit on, or a lady bug, or even the cries of a baby just brought joy to me. I know the baby crying may seem a little weird but I heard a baby cry one day while I was out there and it just amazed me that God had created us as humans and the things we are capable of.

I guess it was just the simple living that I was doing that brought these things to my attention. I just hope I don’t lose sight of these things now that I am back in my normal life. God is still just as amazing even though I have a home and a bed and everything else that we “need.”

I also learned a lot about who it is that is actually willing to help you in hard times. For the most part, though there are exceptions, it is the hard working individuals who may even be struggling to pay their own bills who are most willing to lend a hand. People like landscapers, mechanics and taxi drivers. It’s also for the most part relatively young people. I never had anyone over around 50 provide any help. Though I did have an old guy in a silver Porsche pull up next to me and rev up his engine and then peel out as he headed off. That didn’t make me too happy. But on the other hand it was always the younger generation, my generation, that would cuss me out.

It was also amazing to me the things that can make you happy. When I wasn’t so surrounded with technology and my greatest worry was where to get the things I really need, I was able to find joy in most everything that wasn’t terrible. It didn’t have to be anything spectacular. This kind of goes back to the greatness of God, but honestly one time I was just sitting in the sun at the park and found a lady bug on me and it made me so happy! It was such a simple thing but I loved it greatly.

I also learned that I have an irrational fear of becoming a father. Not too sure why, but being around those kids and seeing their situation I realized it absolutely frightens me to know I may one day be a dad.

It is not hard to love people. People are for the most part loveable. We just don’t give them a chance and refuse to see past the surface. We should stop doing that.

Another thing is that Hymns rock. They are so soothing and can help to get you through some rough times. Nearly everyday I was out there I would wake up with a random song stuck in my head. Most of which ended up being Hymns I haven’t even heard in years. It was a weird thing but I would go around the whole day singing the same song and it made me happy.

Finally I think I now have a better understanding of what Paul meant when he talked about becoming all things to all people. How are we to know how to minister to those whose situations we are entirely ignorant to?

Simple Man

Insomnia!

Down on the Corner